Blogging has been a huge weight on my chest lately. I love blogging, and I love reading other blogs. I love seeing all your amazing, unique posts and just being a part of the blogging community in general. But lately I’ve just felt so “bleh” about blogging. I want to blog soooo badly, and I long for the days when I had so many ideas bouncing around in my head that I couldn’t write a post fast enough.
Now it seems like I just have nothing left to put into this blog, like my brain is just empty. I look around at all the bloggers who have been blogging for way less time than I have, but have gotten so much farther than me. If I’m being completely honest I am a little jealous of these bloggers. They have such conviction and work so hard at blogging. I used to be the same way, putting so much into this blog and getting so involved in the community. Now I feel like all the hard work I put into this blog was for nothing, that I’ve pretty much given up.
I guess another thing is that it feels like a lot has changed in the 3.5 years I’ve had this blog. A lot of the people who were at one point my really good blogging friends have left the blogging world. I adore all of the new blogs I read and the new friends I’ve made, but I also feel like I’ve lost a lot of the original connections I made when I started this blog.
A few months ago I was pretty sure I was going to shut this blog down, or at least abandon it. Right now I can’t imagine doing that, because I’ve put so much work into it and when it really comes down to it, I do enjoy blogging. I’m just feeling tired of sitting in front of my laptop, with absolutely no clue what to post. I want the things I post to be meaningful, and for people to care about them. I have ideas floating around in my head, but I when I actually try to write about them, it feels so pointless. Will anyone even care anymore? This blog has been going downhill for so long now… Is there even any point in trying to bring it back?
I look at my blog and I feel restless and frustrated. It doesn’t feel like me anymore. I’m desperate for a change, but I don’t know how to achieve it. I’m thinking the easiest way for me to change it right now is aesthetically. But then I worry that if I put even more money and effort into this blog to completely change the look, what if I then find that even that isn’t enough and I’ve done all that for nothing?
If you’ve made it this far, then 4 for you Glen Coco! You’re probably tired of me complaining, but I was sitting in front of my laptop trying to convince myself to post something, and I asked myself, “What do you want to talk about Chloe? If you could post about absolutely anything…”. And this just felt like the most important thing right now.
I don’t know if anyone is even going to read this, or really going to care, but I’m glad I posted it. I want to say that you should expect big changes ahead, and I can’t wait to get back into the blogging world, a million exclamation points, etc. etc., but in reality I’m not sure how (or if) I’m going to get out of this slump.